“I wish I have never done that. I am not a good father. I am not a protector of my family. I should have done it this way or that way.” These thoughts are the territory of the devil to keep us self-absorbed in our problems, regret does not come from God.
Right ways: “Lord, thank you for your unfathomable mercy. Lord, I am not worthy that you should enter under my roof but only say the Word and my soul shall be healed (this is good before receiving Communion). Mary, hold me and comfort me. Mary, be a mother to me now. Saint Joseph, be a father to me now.” When I fall is when I do not call out to heaven for help, the goal is to build contrition for my sin and be like a little child. “Mama, Dada, I need your help!”
*Come now, let us set things right, says the LORD: Though your sins be like scarlet, they may become white as snow; Though they be red like crimson, they may become white as wool. If you are willing, and obey, you shall eat the good things of the land. ~Isaiah 1:18-19
Holding a Crucifix and a Rosary, sing a lullaby to your baby. Feel the pure pain of not having this opportunity on earth and unite this pain to the Cross. Unite the pain of not having the opportunity to tuck this little soul into bed, kissing/blessing them, making cereal, etc… These thoughts stir up the wound in my heart. Our wound united the Jesus’ wounds is the narrow road to healing, and it pours out graces upon us and the whole world. This is being a victim soul.
*Amen, amen, I say to you, whoever believes in Me will do the works that I do, and will do greater ones than these, because I am going to the Father. And whatever you ask in My name, I will do, so that the Father may be glorified in the Son. If you ask anything of Me in My name, I will do it. ~John 14:12-14
The whole meaning to my life is to grow in union with my God, through the hands of my Mama. Micah